certainthings: (SerialKiller!Jared & SerialKiller!Sandy)
[personal profile] certainthings
[stoled from [livejournal.com profile] mrbig1316]

Micmezle never wet her bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

Micmezle once partook in a pissing contest outside of a bar. Her opponent drowned.

Micmezle doesn't see dead people. She makes people dead.

We all know the magic word is please. As in the sentence, "Please don't kill me." Too bad Micmezle doesn't believe in magic.

The saddest moment for children is not when they learn Santa Claus isn't real, it's when they learns Micmezle is.

Micmezle once finished "The Song that Never Ends".

During the Vietnam War, Micmezle allowed herself to be captured. For torture, they made her eat her own entrails. She asked for seconds.


Micmezle does not sleep. She waits.

Giraffes were created when Micmezle uppercutted a horse.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Micmezle allows to live.

Micmezle can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

***

The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Jensen Ackles, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.

Police label anyone attacking Jensen Ackles as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.

On his birthday, Jensen Ackles randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

Some kids pee their name in the snow. Jensen Ackles can pee his name into concrete.

Jensen Ackles eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

The pie scene in "American Pie" is based on a dare Jensen Ackles took when he was younger. However, in Jensen Ackles' case, the "pie" was the molten crater of an active volcano.

***

Jared Padalecki and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

Jared Padalecki once bench-pressed the entire state of Ohio, and all of its residents.

"Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie. It's also what Jared Padalecki calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.

People created the automobile to escape from Jared Padalecki...Not to be outdone, Jared Padalecki created the automobile accident.

Everybody loves Raymond. Except Jared Padalecki.

According to the Bible, God created the universe in six days. Before that, Jared Padalecki created God by snapping his fingers.

here

Date: 2007-11-19 05:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pocketfullof.livejournal.com
That site seems strangely concerned with the state of Ohio.

It gets drowned in fecal matter, bench pressed....

Date: 2007-11-19 05:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pippilottah.livejournal.com
Ahaha, those are some impressing facts. I especially like Jared's.

Date: 2007-11-19 05:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] punnky-kitty.livejournal.com
LMAO Jared Padalecki and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

Damn right!

I'm gonna be on this thing all day. LOL
Jared Padalecki got a perfect score on his SAT's, simply by writing Jared Padalecki for every answer.

Date: 2007-11-19 05:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fromyourashes.livejournal.com
STEALING!!!! BUAH AHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Date: 2007-11-19 06:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hanyo-alchemist.livejournal.com
I love it when things are done for the lulz.

Date: 2007-11-19 06:29 pm (UTC)
ext_16473: (Default)
From: [identity profile] ellel.livejournal.com
Too bad Micmezle doesn't believe in magic.
LMAO!!!

And Jared's facts are too awesome;)

Date: 2007-11-19 06:37 pm (UTC)
ext_4073: (marauder sammy)
From: [identity profile] cormallen.livejournal.com
Dude.
Jensen Ackles has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from UNO.

*giggle snort*

Date: 2007-11-19 06:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gottalovev.livejournal.com
highly entertaining! lol! I love the first of Jared's...

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that gottalovev's PC will crash.

you bet!

Date: 2007-11-19 07:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quarterwhore.livejournal.com
LMAO! I love those. So funny!!

Date: 2007-11-19 07:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bubbles83.livejournal.com
Some kids pee their name in the snow. Jensen Ackles can pee his name into concrete

I belive it.

Date: 2007-11-19 07:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
Maybe they live there or had a bad experience there.

Date: 2007-11-19 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
I think this place is going to help with the passing of time today

Date: 2007-11-19 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
Giraffes were created when Micmezle uppercutted a horse.

I think that might be my favourite.

Date: 2007-11-19 07:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
It's so addicting!

Date: 2007-11-19 07:25 pm (UTC)

Date: 2007-11-19 07:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
Before that, Jared Padalecki created God by snapping his fingers.

I HEART that one.

Date: 2007-11-19 07:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
*cracks the fuck up*

Date: 2007-11-19 07:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
Hahaha. *ahem*

Date: 2007-11-19 07:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
RIGHT?! *wastes the day away*

Date: 2007-11-19 07:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
I wonder how many buildings he's written his name into.

Date: 2007-11-19 08:08 pm (UTC)
ext_16555: (jared; perpetual bliss)
From: [identity profile] santacarlagypsy.livejournal.com
According to the Bible, God created the universe in six days. Before that, Jared Padalecki created God by snapping his fingers. ~ DAMN STRAIGHT, HE DID. ; )
Edited Date: 2007-11-19 08:14 pm (UTC)

Date: 2007-11-19 08:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
That Jared's sure got talent.

Date: 2007-11-19 08:43 pm (UTC)
ext_16473: (Default)
From: [identity profile] ellel.livejournal.com
I spent almost an hour at this site!My facts were too violent,lol.
*shakes head*

Date: 2007-11-19 11:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] apey1013.livejournal.com
*sitting in Ohio* Hmm...I'm sensing a trend.

Date: 2007-11-19 11:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] apey1013.livejournal.com
And then he winked at God and said "you take it from here, kiddo."

Date: 2007-11-19 11:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
It's in the bible

Date: 2007-11-20 12:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
A lasting trend?

Date: 2007-11-20 02:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] astrablue.livejournal.com
The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Jensen Ackles, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.

I almost spit out my water when I read this. *dies of laughter*

Everybody loves Raymond. Except Jared Padalecki.

Hehe. And Astra.

Date: 2007-11-20 03:22 am (UTC)
ext_16555: (sam; sticky fingers)
From: [identity profile] santacarlagypsy.livejournal.com
That Jared's sure got talent. ~ Yep. I'm pretty sure he used those lovely fingers of his to create Jensen, too....

Date: 2007-11-20 03:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
Right? Like I knew Jensen was talented and such but I had no idea he was a freaking INVENTOR! And to have his name attached to such a ... thing, him and his family must be so proud, eh?

Date: 2007-11-20 04:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
You should provide examples.

Date: 2007-11-20 05:03 pm (UTC)
ext_16473: (SN 305 D/S gay by mediocrechick)
From: [identity profile] ellel.livejournal.com
I saved only few:)

Ghosts are actually caused by Ellel killing people faster than Death can process them.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Ellel.

Guns don't kill people. Ellel kills People.

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Ellel allows to live.

Give a man a fish, and you will feed him for a day. Give a man anything that is better than a fish, and Ellel will beat his ass and take it.


Date: 2007-11-20 05:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
I LOVE those.

Date: 2007-11-20 05:51 pm (UTC)
ext_16473: (Default)
From: [identity profile] ellel.livejournal.com
You want some good entertainment?Get Dean's facts,lol.There are almost correct!;)

Date: 2007-11-20 06:02 pm (UTC)

Date: 2007-11-25 11:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buffyaddict13.livejournal.com
*snort*

this is awesome!

The saddest moment for children is not when they learn Santa Claus isn't real, it's when they learns Micmezle is.

*loves and fears you at same time*

brokeback mountain = dead ninjas = FTW!

Date: 2007-11-25 11:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] certainthings.livejournal.com
I love the dead ninjas part. And Too bad Micmezle doesn't believe in magic.

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